let you put your hands on me in my skin tight jeans

For the first time ever, I went thrifting today! Me and Maeve went to all these cool little vintage clothing/thrift shops and saw some pretty interesting stuff. Our favorite store was definitely this little place in Shadyside called Hey Betty! Apparently a lot of celebrities have shopped there. And they have an adorable little puppy that sits by the window so it's a win win situation really. They had a lot of varieties of clothing from different time periods so pretty much anything you could want from the past is available - from leather minis to wide legged flower power jumpsuits to old Army jackets and letterman sweaters, it's all there! I didn't even buy anything and I can't wait to go back. The other places weren't as good...a couple were actually pretty sketchy and had funky smells wafting you in the face as you walk in but it was an overall fun day.

Well that was written yesterday...it's now Wednesday which means only about a day and a half until I'm back in Indiana :) I'm so super excited. I've started going through all my laundry and clothing to start the long process of packing everything up. Going through all my clothes makes me feel kind of awful. There's so many things that I never wore or just don't like wearing anymore. I'm such a brat. I should probably just bag up all the stuff I really don't wear anymore and give it to some charity thing or something. But then my mother gets all agitated because half the stuff I'd want to give away would be stuff she bought me and I secretly hated/never even wore. So really it's a lose lose situation because whenever my mother gets mad at me it always makes me feel terrible. I don't know why but certain things like that make me feel really awful. Like just hearing someone say something in a disappointed or upset way make me really sad. I have no idea why really. It doesn't even have to be any major thing at all but just the way someone says something can bring me down. And every time it's happened I always wonder if other people feel the same way. Maybe not about the same thing I heard but just in general. Do you ever hear something and get really sad? Keep in mind I don't mean like someone being like "My turtle died today" :( I mean just saying something like...I don't even know...just something not that bad or even sad. I think I just have an extremely prominent conscience with stuff like that. It happens too whenever I have some disagreement with either of my parents. If I get so tired of hearing them lecture me or go on about something I've heard a million times over, I'll usually blow up at them after a while and say something I really don't mean or just outright yell at them and then I leave the room and literally a second later feel absolutely terrible for saying whatever it was I said. I never even apologize either. It just kind of eventually moves itself on but until things are back to normal again, I feel terrible in the back of my mind for being mean. People probably do feel like this all the time. But I can't decide if I would rather feel like that or just never get to say the things I want to say when I want to say them and feel regretful about that. Like in You've Got Mail when Meg Ryan's character, Kathleen, is explaining to "NY152" that she never gets the chance to say exactly what she wants at exactly the right moment. And then finally she does it to Joe Fox and instantly regrets doing it. There's really no winning I suppose. Either keep your mouth shut and feel like you should've said something or say what you want and have to deal with the possible feeling of regret.

Now that I only have the rest of today and tomorrow to do ALL of my packing, I should probably get off the computer and get to it! Sadly though, I know I'll post this and continue listening to music and playing online Sudoku. PROCRASTINATION PROCRASTINATION PROCRASTINATION!!!

Thanks for reading:)
Love,
Rachel